I find that I often say "No thank you" no matter what it is when people offer and I wondered why I do that...
I was trying to explain to her why maybe the maintenance guy wouldn't take her up on the soda can she offered him. We talked about a few reasons. 1. He didn't want to take something from her out of politeness- i.e. put her out in anyway 2. Maybe he didn't want it 3. I guess there is always some suspicion? Who knows. I think in other cultures it is the most polite thing to accept. Maybe I should be better about that =)
Sorry for all the rambling- just thought I would get your thoughts on the matter!
4 comments:
This is one of those things that I do all the time but never stop to thinking about why. Usually, if I don't NEED it, I won't take it just because I don't want to put a burden on them. I love serving, but I do have a hard time letting people give back to me. I like to think that I am always in the position to help and never need help---yup, definitely something I need to work on. Haha. Thanks for sharing Joni! I enjoyed stopping and thinking about it :)
There may be reason number 4, some people who work in services are told they can not take things from their clients like soda or something because it is against their company's policy. Probably not the reason for the maintenance guy but maybe.
Joni, I tutor a Korean woman in ESL too and she always puts out a little tray of fruit for me with water. I thought it was the sweetest thing, but didn't really get why she did it! This makes sense now!
I think Americans decline out of "politeness" too. They don't want to put someone out or inconvenience them. They also don't want to take for free what someone else has worked for. I think it goes back to our American roots of working REALLY hard to make it for yourself. For instance, the thought that anybody can go from rags to riches in America and that you deserve what you earn/achieve.
p.s. Not that I agree with this mentality, but I seem to follow it by refusing help, making it "on my own." America still resembles this mindset, to me, today especially when I hear the politics going own.
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